π βWeβre better caregivers, writers, and humans when we take time for ourselves.β
Author Q&A with Jessi Gold, practical tips to overcome burnout ππΌ
Boola Bos is located in Toronto / Tkaronto. We acknowledge that the land weβre on is the traditional territory of five Indigenous communities: Ho-de-no-sau-nee-ga (Haudenosaunee), Wendake-NionwentsΓ―o, Anishinabewaki ααααα―αα, Mississaugas of the Credit First Nation, and Mississauga. The territory consists of ceded land, covered under the Toronto Treaty 13 of the Upper Canada Land Surrenders, and the Williams Treaties, as well as unceded land that continues to be contested. We acknowledge the genocide, systematic oppression, and exploitation of Aboriginal peoples, land, cultures, and languages across what we now know as Canada. As writers we are particularly aware of the tremendous power of language and place names and invite you to learn more about the land you inhabit, the history of that land, and how to actively be part of a better future going forward together at Native Land or Whose Land.
π Letter From The Editor ππ»ββοΈ
Hello friend!
And Happy October / Spooky Season / Harvest Season / Samhain to you! Dagwaagin! π
Itβs been awhile!
In August I took some time off toβ¦ I wonβt say relax because relaxation is rare with a five-year-old around π but I stopped writing and working and went home to Ireland and the UK for a visit which was wonderful.
Now Iβm all business again and have spent the last few weeks cooking up some really great opportunities for you. Thereβs a lot happening behind the scenes atm and I canβt wait to share more soon π
During this period of planning and strategizing Iβve been thinking a lot about why I launched Boola Bos and see now that itβs because, in all honesty, the way weβre used to doing things as writers or publishing industry-adjacent folks is clearly not working and if I think about it for too long it boils my blood.
So Boola Bos is how Iβm getting proactive and trying to solve the problem instead!
When I say βnot workingβ, I mean: writers spending years out on their own writing their book (i.e., creating intellectual property) with little or no support only to, nine times out of ten, sell that book without being fairly compensated.
That the publishing industry is economically unjust will not be news to you. But in my experience most of us havenβt yet examined the ways that affects us. Thatβs a topic for a whole other newsletter but I wanted you to know that weβre hard at work over here figuring out how to reshape things so that writers (both published and unpublished) as well as book workers of all kinds can continue to do this work and thrive while doing so.
So, Priority #1 over here is to figure out how to lessen the hardship on writers and aspiring authors who do most, if not all, of their work out in the wilds. Unpaid. Unstructured. Unsupported. With no guarantees and no notion of whether youβre doing it right.
To that end, we are building out programs that offer an alternative way to write books. One that is much more enjoyable, fruitful, and creative than the way most of us are accustomed too. Basically, we want you to finish writing your book already and get some traction in your writing life.
Writing a manuscript should not take as long as it takes most of us, even if you have a job and a kid and chronic health issues and a parent who inexplicably needs you to reset their internet at least once a week..!
Iβm not talking here about βoptimizingβ or βstreamliningβ your creative process. The creative, artistic part of writing is inherently inefficient and that, imo, is how it should be. In fact, Iβm currently in that phase with my second book and am loving the wild ride that early research and drafting is. Yesterday the research gods led me to reading a whole book about sealβs migratory patterns in the North Atlantic π€·π»ββοΈ Not something Iβd planned for and not something Iβll probably ever use in my book but Iβd hate to lose that. (Did you know that seals love music and, to this day, you can still meet some older fishermen in the southwest of Ireland who will sing the local sealsβ favourite songs if you ask nicely?)
But there are many parts of the book-writing process that should NOT take as long as they do and that is what weβre zeroing in on.
So keep your eyes peeled for more details about that. Weβll tell you all about it here in Boola Bos Magazine as soon as possible.
As for Priority #2 which is dismantling the economic injustice of the publishing industryβ¦ well, youβll have to stay tuned π
In the meantime, weβve got some great features below and hope you enjoy!
Beir Bua (for those interested: this is pronounced: βbare boo-ahβ, and at the end of a note simply means βBest Wishesβ, but actually translates literally as βseize victoryβ!)
Bron π
Bronwen Keyes-Bevan
Founder, Boola Bos
πβπ» Author Q&A with Jessi Gold: βWeβre better caregivers, writers, and humans when we take time for ourselves.βπππΌ
Psychiatrist and author Jessi Gold, MD, MS, shares practical advice on how you can protect your mental health, avoid burnout, and stay resilient in your creative and caregiving roles.
In a world that celebrates the hustle, finding balance between caring for others and caring for ourselves can feel like an impossible task. Jessi Gold, psychiatrist and author of the poignant memoir How Do You Feel?, knows this struggle all too well.
Through her work in psychiatry and her personal journey of navigating burnout and perfectionism, Gold offers a deeply empathetic and expert perspective on the unspoken mental and emotional costs of caregiving, both professionally and at home.
In this interview with Boola Bos Magazine, Gold shares her insights on how you can protect your mental health while juggling multiple rolesβwhether itβs balancing writing with parenting, dealing with perfectionism, or managing the emotional labor that weighs heavily on you. Her advice speaks directly to progressive, creative women navigating their writing ambitions while managing the demands of family life and the reality of a culture that is way more sexist than it likes to pretend to be.
If youβve ever felt torn between pursuing your writing and navigating your responsibilities, Goldβs wisdom will remind you that aside from everything else, itβs critical to, at the very least, take care of yourself.
BOOLA BOS: How Do You Feel? delves deeply into the mental health struggles of healthcare professionals. What are some practical steps that writers and aspiring authors can take to maintain their mental wellbeing while juggling multiple responsibilities?
JESSI GOLD: In my experience, writing can have significant effects on our mental healthβwhether it is the content we are writing about, the people we are interviewing for it, the personal nature of the stories, or even the isolation of writing itself. The act of writing, too, can be therapeutic, and help us process, but processing often means we have to go through the feelings associated with the content to come out on the reflective other side. Despite all of this, many writers donβt necessarily notice the effects of their work on their mental health or even plan on considering the potential for them when approaching writing a piece or a book, but they should.
A few simple tips to consider when writing or approaching writing to maintain your mental health:
Take breaks: The science behind breaks is varied in terms of how much time or how often, but what matters is that you get up, switch tasks, and even take time to go outside or socialize (i.e., why the βwater coolerβ is a thing). Sometimes we think βIf I just sit here for thirty more minutes, I will be productive,β when often if we take a break and come back, even for less time, we are actually more productive. This also includes breaks from reading the news or scrolling social media. It affects our mental health, even if we have to stay up with it for work, and will still be there if we pause and step away from it.
Give yourself rewards: We do sticker charts for kids to do chores or potty train for a reason. Sometimes we still need rewards to get through a particular chunk of writing or stay on task. Feeling effective, and getting something in return, can help our mental health.
Figure out what self-care skills work for you, and do those: There are many types of skills that can work to help you prioritize yourself (mindfulness or journaling or exercise or stupid TV). We often prescribe them given the existing evidence on their success, but like hobbies, you should choose the ones you like and will do. Incorporating them, even small ones, throughout your day and week will help you feel more centered and well.
Go to therapy: Therapy is a key outlet to process and understand ourselves, especially the topics you might be writing about and how they are making you feel. It makes you more prepared for the writing process, and can also help with stuck points or motivation.
BB: People sometimes feel as if, all of a sudden, they are very burnt out. What are some early warning signs of burnout that people should watch out for, and what strategies can they employ to prevent it?
JG: Often we feel βall of the suddenβ burned out because we werenβt noticing ourselves and our feelings all along. I am guilty of this myself. We also exist in a work culture where it is normalized to be burned out and so we look around and everyone else seems equivalently bad, and we assume that is just how we all should feel. But it isnβt, and we can do better.
It all starts by actively making sure to ask yourself: HOW DO I FEEL? We spend so much time asking others, we forget to ask ourselves, and by the time we notice we are human and have symptoms, we are emotionally and physically spent.
What burnout might look like earlier can vary by person, but can include things like:
Feeling irritable more often, including outside of work
feeling overwhelmed even by small tasks (including things like emails, that involve demands on your time)
slight changes to your schedule (you used to cook all the time, and now are doing take-out because you donβt have the capacity)
procrastination in the workplace
If we ask ourselves how we are earlier, and more often, we will notice little changes and these earlier warning signs. Then we may be able to do an intervention (like call a friend or go for a walk) to help.
If we wait, the only intervention can end up being work leave, and that comes with its own challenges and complications.
BB: Resilience is a crucial skill for anyone. Can you share some practical techniques or habits that people can develop to build and sustain resilience in their creative pursuits?
JG: People often cringe at the word resilience. In my opinion, that is because for so long instead of noticing the impact of the system or a workplace on our mental health, we taught resilience skills and people thought the impetus was on them, to fix themselves. Resilience, though, is more about finding ways to survive in a broken workplace. Some big ways to do that can help.
One is finding meaning and purpose in your writing. This can feel philosophical, but at its core it is asking you to centre your work on what gets you out of bed in the morning. You can do this by assessing your workday by things that give you meaning and things that donβt (or give you energy versus deplete it), and trying to move things around to attain balance between the two.
We also often say no to things when we are overwhelmed, but those can be the things we get meaning from (mentoring, friends, extracurriculars). We have to be careful not to do that. To-do lists can help. These can be broken down into doable tasks as we feel more resilient when we are effective. Instead of βwrite a chapterβ maybe it says βwrite five pages,β and that actually can be accomplished. It might lead to a longer to-do list, but a doable one.
Supportive work environments and relationships with friends can also really help with resilience. You donβt need a million people to talk to, but having someone you can bounce ideas off of, turn to to vent and ask questions, and even just listen, can make a huge difference.
βPeople often cringe at the word resilience. In my opinion, that is because for so long instead of noticing the impact of the system or a workplace on our mental health, we taught resilience skills and people thought the impetus was on them, to fix themselves. Resilience, though, is more about finding ways to survive in a broken workplace.β
βJessi Gold, in conversation with Boola Bos Magazine
BB: Perfectionism is a common challenge for many professionals, as we saw in How Do You Feel?. What practical advice can you offer to people struggling with perfectionism?
JG: I think one of the biggest things to do when you struggle with perfectionism is learning to identify and name it in yourself, and then trying to understand the root of it for you, and how it affects your life. I have done this in many ways, but therapy has been a prominent one. Learning, for example, that being the βsmart oneβ meant I needed to get all As in school, even if no one ever said that explicitly to me, made it very hard for me to be OK even getting a B. That only worsened as I got older, entered more competitive environments, like medical school.
But the truth is, we all fail and have our weaknesses because we are human, and accepting that has helped me not feel completely destroyed by it. I have learned to value vulnerability and βfailingβ as a part of my success, and that reframe has made all of the difference.
BB: The struggle to balance empathy for others with self-care is a recurring issue in your narrative. What advice would you give to people who often find themselves prioritizing othersβ needs (their children, their spouse, their employer) over their own, and how can they create boundaries to protect their mental health?
JG: We all struggle with caring for ourselves as we care for others. It is obvious to me as a psychiatrist, putting patients above myself so often, but it happens to all of us. Still, we have to see caring for ourselves as part of caring for the other person, or as part of being good at our jobs. We are better (insert any noun here: daughters, husbands, caregivers, employees, friends) when we take time for ourselves. Taking time for you isnβt selfish, itβs necessary.
I often think the biggest struggle we have with balancing empathy and self-care is time. We feel like we canβt possibly take time for ourselves when so many people need us. But really, you can learn to do things that donβt take up much timeβlike writing down 3 good things about your day, or walking the stairs at work and centering yourself with a phrase, or exhaling longer than you inhale. It is great to go to an exercise class, but we canβt always. We can, however, still find ways to center ourselves in the hustle of our lives, and it can make a world of difference.
How Do You Feel? is available now from Simon & Schuster. You can order it at our Bookshop.org page. Purchasing books through Bookshop.org supports authors, indie bookstores, and small businesses. Win-win-win!
Okay, friend, thatβs a wrap on this issue but weβll be back soon with more! We hope you have a fruitful harvest season, whatever that means to you, and are sending you lots of good writing energy β¨
So much wisdom in this one, thank you! <3
Lovely issue! Thanks!